3 misconceptions pastors wife 940x492

When I was in high school, I went to the Hawaiian Island Ministries Conference. During one of the sessions God told me that I was going to marry a youth pastor. I know it might sound crazy (I totally thought I was hearing things), but I heard it clear as day. I eventually forgot all about what I had heard that day until I brought my college boyfriend home with me. While talking with one of my mentors, she mentioned how great it was that what I had heard many years ago on that day could possibly come true. I could possibly become a pastor’s wife. I was so nervous because I didn’t think I was perfect enough to be the wife of a pastor! Obviously it all worked out great and here I am – a pastor’s wife. While my husband and I are so lucky that we have been a part of such an amazing church family, there are still certain myths or misconceptions that go along with being the wife of a pastor.

1. Pastor’s wives have it all together

For those of you who know me, you know this couldn’t be further from the truth. As I’m writing this I’m sitting on unwashed sheets that my newborn just spit up on, surrounded by 3 loads of unfolded laundry. I know, I know — You just saw the pictures I posted earlier of the baby sleeping peacefully and me making cookies with my toddler. You also noticed on Sunday morning that we were on time and the kids even looked cute. Every once in a while the stars line up just right and it appears I have my life together but I wouldn’t hold my breath for the next time that happens again.

2. Pastor’s wives have the same giftings as their husband

My husband is a great speaker. He can get up in front of 500 people, multiple times a day, without feeling like he’s going to pass out. But that doesn’t mean I want to lead the women’s bible study. (Although lets be honest, you probably don’t want me to unless you want to see someone break out in a rash and stutter the whole night).

However, I do consider the church my ministry as well and I want to see it grow! I love my church and if there are needs that haven’t been met I will absolutely do my best to help.

3. Pastor’s wives know everything that’s going on at the church

I get asked, ALL the time, if I know if there is youth group over the holiday week or if I know what time the adult small group meets. My husband actually works at the church and he might not even know the answer. And even when he does know, we don’t exactly sit at home talking about different church events going on. But even though us wives don’t know everything, we sure would love to help you find someone who does!

Although I’m not joking that these things do actually happen to me all the time, it really doesn’t bother me that much. I consider it a privilege to be a wife of a pastor. If being asked to lead a women’s small group is the worst thing that happens to me on Sunday, I’ll consider that a pretty good day.


3 Common Misconceptions About Pastor's Wives

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